I was 13 years old, hairy, in the midst of an extremely awkward adolescence, and desperate for a little glamour in my boring, suburban life.
As an aspiring beauty junkie with a lot of time on my hands, I would read every beauty magazine and book I could get in my hairy little arms, always searching for something I could try at home to improve upon the gawkiness mother nature was letting me experience at that time in my life. If it involved something I could use from my mom’s spice cabinet, it was highly preferred.
I’m not sure if I came across the following information in an issue of Vogue, Bazaar, or in a book by old-timey beauty/health expert Gayelord Hauser, but I somehow came across a snippet in which some fabulous, older socialite described mixing up a sugaring recipe whenever she felt the need to get rid of her arm hair.
The recipe seemed simple enough – sugar, water, lemon juice … who really needed a thermometer? After all, I was a soon-to-be graduate of 8th grade science and with many science experiments under my belt, I figured I would be able to eyeball portions and determine when the mix was ready to take off the offending hair that was preventing me from being the belle of junior high.
One of my faults as a human being is that I frequently jump into situations before fully accessing their practicality beforehand, this sugaring/hair removal being a prime example. Some mixing, some ingredient eyeballing, some temperature approximating later, I spooned out a bit of the mix and applied it straight to my left forearm without letting it cool down whatsoever.
And that’s where I got the scar on my left forearm.
That little incident is just one of many, many, many foolish things I have inflicted on myself in the name of beauty. The superglue-d fingers while attempting to strengthen my nails with a coffee filter, the 3 inch scar on my left ankle from a horrible shaving incident …. Yes, I was a child who came of age during the pre-Internet days. If only I’d had a message board to save me from scarring myself.
We all have some crazy story of something or other we’ve done in the name of beauty. What are some of your war stories?