My relationship with Fashion is like most men’s relationship with the West Coast Defense. I can tell you what it is, I can appreciate it when it’s done well, I can tell you how it screwed up, but I can never ever do it myself. I am far too fat and far too poor for couture. Luckily for people such as myself there is Project Runway.
Now, I feel for Project Runway this year. The show moved from the terminally hip BRAVO to the, well, mom-jeans channel Lifetime. While I will whole-heartedly admit to watching re-runs of Reba and the Golden Girls, I wasn’t sure Lifetime was the right channel for Runway. I was also scared because Jonathan Murray of TV’s Real World is producing Runway, and we all know how badly that experiment degenerated. Although I had my reservations, I saw Tim Gunn and I was comforted. I was also weirded out by the new L.A. Locale. NY is fashion; however, the red carpets of LA can really launch a designer so I am over it.
Tim Gunn is national treasure. Although Mr. Gunn would be aghast at my closet (as my favorite designer these days is NFL for her), I still see him as a force for good in the world. Heck, Marvel comics has even made him a superhero!
So I started my night of Runway madness with the 2-hour all-star special. I am going to be frank, this show was made of irk. They bring back my two least favorite people of all time: Jeffery and Santino. I will say, Santino made Jeffery seem like the saint of kindness and love…that should explain it all. I am a little tired of the “ too cool for the room act” these two designers exhibit. Suck it up hipsters; even Alexander McQueen designed for Target. I am also tired of the insinuations that the masses don’t “get it.” We get it; you just design clothes for circus performers on smack. The whole world loves Christian Siriano because we understand he is avant-garde, but he makes really HOT avant-garde. Putting my dad’s blazer on top of an 80’s teacher dress does not make you hot-style (trademarked Lily) Jeffery. I did like Santino’s collection of stretch metallic and sequins, but that is only because I am a tacky woman.
Despite these, um, d-bags there were some amazing fashion to behold. Korto’s designs were inspired; her mix of textures and love of the female form is evident. Chris March is just a revelation; his use of plaid for evening was mind-blowing. Unfortunately, Daniel Vosovicj, who according to the judges I am supposed to love for his vision, won. I guess I am a fashion-dolt as his “ vision” looked like 7th grade gym class meets a suicide bomber.
(Side note: at this moment my 6 year old is defending Daniel’s collection to my husband. In her defense, the clothes DID look like she designed them. She thinks the collection had “directions”).
I saw a lot of head scratching fashion on this season’s “ make a red carpet dress” premier of the show. The first victim of this season Ari Fish who should really be designing for Barnum and Bailey. Hello?! I know this is a fashion show but someone who sends down a quilted disco ball needs to be on the show until at LEAST the grocery store challenge. I think where this girl failed is that she looked so much like guest –judge Lindsay Lohan’s ex-girlfriend.
We had an ex-meth addict getting comforted by Tim Gunn and almost winning the first challenge. I am sure if I got a daily phone call from Tim Gunn I could take over the world. The dress made by Johnny the Meth Addict could be best described as “ Mrs. Roper meets a Jay-Z video.” Lindsay Lohan of the always awesome and appropriate fashion choices loved it.
We also had the naked-caftan collar guy Mitchell. Who got a lot of flack for his drapery Nashville meets Vivid Video concoction. In his defense, Lil Kim would’ve totally worn that to visit her grandma at the home.
The rest of the designers are quite memorable: Qristal with a Q who designed something fit for the Deb Shop, Malvin who wants to come through the TV and embrace all of our beauty, and Louise who likes vintage and has a Louise Brooks hair style. GET IT! Vintage!
Our winner, Christopher, designed a dress that managed to get all of the Twilight books into fabric. I do like Christopher, and I am amazed he has no formal training.
So dear readers, who are your favorites? What dress would you actually wear? Do we think the really cute designer likes girls?
Make it work!!